When Being Thankful is Difficult

Being thankful during this time of year can be difficult for some. Especially if you’re newly single, divorced or simply longing for a special person to share the holidays with.

Hardships are magnified. When it’s all you can do to keep the bills paid, buying a Thanksgiving turkey with all the trimmings can be burdensome, knowing that budgeting for Christmas is just around the corner.

Family conflicts can also suck the joy out of holiday gatherings.

As Thanksgiving approaches this coming week, for some of you it might be a reminder of some things lost, rather than things to be thankful for.

This season marks a lot of losses for me. Dating back to November of 1988, my divorce was final, just days before Thanksgiving.

Several years later before the holidays, my house was foreclosed on and we had to move.

As a single mom, money was already tight, but the holidays added extra financial pressure.

I remember another time when my kids and I had to move right before Christmas because the house we rented was sold right after Thanksgiving.

Two years ago, my mother-in-law passed away two weeks before Thanksgiving. That same year I had my last Thanksgiving meal with my Mom, as she passed away 12 days before Christmas.

What does this time of year mean for you? Do you have mixed emotions of nostalgia and sadness or does it mean all things cozy and wonderful?

Are you full of thanksgiving and gratitude or are you having a difficult time finding something to be thankful for?

As I mentioned above, some of the hardest times of my life were during the holidays, beginning with Thanksgiving. 

But as sure as I sit here today, I remember those were the times when God leaned in close and intimate, meeting me in the midst of my mess, filling me with gratitude that could only come from Him.

The Lord would always allow me to see someone else whose difficulties were worse than mine. I never had to look far to see someone whose struggles and hardships were far worse.

I read somewhere that making a gratitude list could have a thankful-snowball effect.

So I tried it.

I started with one simple thing. It snowballed from there. A sunny day. A roof over our heads. My kids. My job. Good friends and church family. Coffee. (Yes, coffee too)

You might feel like the things you should be thankful for, you're not. Don't pretend. Move on to that one simple thing for which you are grateful. 

Once I began my list I discovered I could keep going till the cows came home. (a southern expression)

This list was a mighty focus changer. All these little things I was thankful for I realized were provided by God. My greatest and most humble of all things I was thankful for was my salvation in Jesus Christ and personal relationship with Him.

Out of that would flow peace and comfort during the most difficult times. I’d end up awestruck at the goodness of God in my life no matter what my temporary circumstances were.

So what about you? Whether things are on the upside or you’re in a dark time, today is a great time to begin your list. Start with the simplest of things and go from there.

I'm going to start a new list. I really am. 

So grab a pen and a notebook and let’s get started.

May you discover the joy of a thankful heart. I pray God’s comfort and compassion overwhelm you as He turns your desert into a garden. And I pray joy and gladness are yours this coming Thanksgiving and beyond.

The Lord will surely comfort Zion and will look 

with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts 

like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the Lord. 

Joy and gladness will be found in her, 

thanksgiving and the sound of singing.

Isaiah 51:3

Staying the course with a thankful heart,

Terri