Color Your Year

This time last year I was in a desert. It was the first anniversary of

my mom’s passing, and only five months after my step-mom’s passing, who lived in Mississippi with my dad.

I did not want to do Christmas.

At 80 years old, this would be my dad’s first Christmas alone, ever; as far as I knew.

I traveled alone to Mississippi to be with Dad, where we would robotically go through the motions of Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Just the two of us.

On Christmas day, after the last dish was cleaned and leftovers put away, I was relieved. I sensed his relief too.

We got through it.                

I was glad to be alone during the eight-hour drive home the next day. I simply needed to process and give myself permission to grieve.

This desert season also included shallow fellowship with the Lord. 

I was spending the bare minimum of time with Him, in His word and praying; just getting by. Checking it off my list.

It’s no wonder I was thirsty. Hungry. Drained. I knew why I had this longing in my heart and that only Jesus could fill it.

I was tired of the desert. Over it.

My best friend (thank God for those!!!), Sande, has always been strong and consistent with her personal times with God, especially during hard times.

The most grounded woman I know (the one on the right), she passionately studies God’s word. Of all the women Bible-study teachers and writers, she surpasses them all.

One day, during my dry season, we were talking when our conversation turned to Jesus, as it often does. She shared how she’s asking God for their theme for upcoming 2016.

"Theme?" I asked.

She shared how every year she asks God for a theme and color for their daily dates together. She never misses a day of time alone with Jesus. Not one. Ever.

In her words, “I have a date everyday with Jesus!” She further shared how He would never stand her up, so how could she. She emphasized to me how she needed this time with Him; that it wasn’t because she’d arrived in any way, but because of her need.

After our talk I decided to copycat Sande’s prayer. I asked God for a theme and color to represent what He wanted to do in me in 2016. 

I made a new commitment to meet with Him daily, even when it meant getting up before the roosters.

Wow! It was one of the quickest prayers He’s ever answered! It resonated with me completely.

GREEN. GROW.

All shades of green are some of my favorite colors. Spring and Summer are my favorite seasons because of the fresh green life taking root and growing.

Excited, I prepared by buying a green journal, pens, selected a three-year Bible-reading plan and got ready to grow on my dates with Jesus.

Finding a new place to be alone with Him was important. Part of our attic above the garage is finished and makes a perfect solitary place away from distractions. I incorporated some greens with blues and yellows (together they make green), in my new surroundings. 

I never explained to my husband why I disappeared every morning behind a closed door in the little room above our garage. Thirty minutes quickly turned into the quickest hour of every day!

God has been faithful! He shows up every morning. I can’t say it’s all been feely-good, spirit-filled warm fuzzy times.

There has been gentle discipline from Him, and coming clean on my part. Each time I could feel roots going down into the fresh soil of grace and mercies He met me with each morning.

He refreshed my heart. He placed a new passion in me for prayer. He sent living water into my desert, making it like a well-watered garden.

Now I’m hooked.

We have only two weeks left in 2016. I asked the Lord again for a theme and color for 2017. I’m telling you the truth when I say that before the words came out of my mouth, He showed me.

Red. Love.

I’m not a big fan of red. And I’ve always felt I didn’t love well and have difficulty receiving love. And since He knows this about me, it makes perfect sense. Once again I’m excited about my dates with Jesus!

Now it’s your turn.

Do you long to be close with Jesus, but you struggle with knowing where to read in your Bible? Do you have problems focusing; fighting distractions?

Ask Him to show you a theme and color for the upcoming year. He longs to date you. He longs to tell you many things.

Call to Me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. Jeremiah 33:3

After you ask Him, and He shows you, I want to hear back from you. Come back here and share below in the comments your theme for your dates with Jesus in 2017. 

Staying the course,

Terri

Big Decisions? Where's wisdom when you need It?

An unexpected crisis. A big decision. A hectic, out-of-control schedule.

How do you know what the right thing to do is? How can you handle the crisis; your big decision or know what to remove from your busy life?

How often do you exhale these words, “I need wisdom”?

I’ve made a lot of mistakes in the past. Wrong assumptions. Times when I thought God was leading me in a certain direction, only to find out I was off the path.

I went through a season of doubting my ability to discern and hear God’s voice. I avoided decisions that required stepping out in faith. I questioned whether I’d ever heard God’s voice or truly experienced His leading. 

I know not to trust my heart completely because I’ve been led astray by it before. I’ve found that Jeremiah 17:9 is true: The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?

That’s hard to swallow when the world’s motto is follow your heart. When we follow our heart's wisdom, we get tossed to and fro by every wind and wave. There is no stability in following your heart.

In hindsight, I see where I’ve heard God, but then stepped ahead of Him, instead of waiting. I assumed He meant NOW, right NOW. 

Then there were those times I jumped in with my emotions, without further confirmation from Him.

I’m learning that when I feel a nudge or tug in my heart, rather than ASSUMING it’s from God, I simply ask Him. Then wait while coming to Him and His word daily.

God will never withhold guidance, instruction or wisdom when we ask for it.

Wisdom is not hidden from us. Wisdom isn’t silent. It’s not a mystery or big secret only available to certain people.

Wisdom isn’t quiet and can be easily heard from anyone who asks, listens, adheres to, watches and waits.

Does not wisdom call out? Does not understanding 

raise her voice? At the highest point along the way, 

where the paths meet, she takes her stand; beside the 

gate leading into the city, at the entrance, she cries 

aloud: To you, O people, I call out; I raise my voice to 

all mankind. Proverbs 8:1-4

The question to ask is, are we listening?

I’m a visionary type of girl. God sometimes uses mind pictures to show me something.

I picture wisdom packed in a treasure chest. Kind of like the old ones you see in attics and garages or in a movie. You know, where the actress is staring at the big old trunk with anticipation of what’s inside. Will she open it or not?

In my mind, this trunk has W-I-S-D-O-M across the front and

packed inside are all its attributes. What would you do? Open it? Leave it? Or would you pull everything out, gratefully scooping it up and putting it to use?

Here's what you'd find:

Understanding

Prudence (cautious reasoning)

Truth

Knowledge

Trustworthy advice

Justice

Discernment

Instruction

Discretion

Counsel

Sound Judgement

Insight

Riches and honor

Righteousness

Justice

How can you apply all this sound wisdom to your life?

Begin here:

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and 

knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. Proverbs 9:10

Fear, as in reverent fear, not scared fear.

Throughout Proverbs 8 we’re instructed further:

Now, then, my children, listen to me; blessed 

are those who keep my ways. Proverbs 8:32

Listen to my instruction and be wise; 

do not disregard it. Proverbs 8:33

Blessed are those who listen to me, watching daily 

at my doors, waiting at my doorway. Proverbs 8:34

Fear God. Listen. Keep His ways. Watch daily. Wait. Do all these to gain priceless wisdom and direction. He will never steer you wrong.

Staying the course,
Terri

Need Direction? Feeling Frustrated?

I was frustrated…with God. Downright irritated. 

I know. Who am I to be frustrated with our sovereign, Heavenly Father?

In my tired and weepy state, I approached His throne; not in humility and reverence, but with frustration. Complaining.

“Lord, You’re the One who opened these doors. I wasn’t seeking it. You’re the One who made this vision reality. We need direction. And funding. The needs are great. I’m terrible at this.

Naturally, I desire favor, a good name, fruitful outcomes. Not only in ministry, but in my personal life.

I yearn to be nearer to God; to enjoy peaceful paths, provision and confidence when I step out to do His work.

I want God’s blessings, grace and His eternal riches; to walk through this earth and feel safe, enjoying sweet sleep, trusting in His protection and future plans for me. Not fear of sudden disaster; fear of things that may never happen.

Who doesn’t? Surely I’m not alone in this.

As I often do, I turned to the Book of Proverbs, hoping to find some wisdom; a tad of knowledge. Whatever the date is, is where I always begin. This particular morning was the 3^rd.

I began with Proverbs 3:1-2

My son, (or daughter) do not forget my teaching, 

but keep my commands in your heart, for they will 

prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity.

It’s as if Father God started speaking. Not in a finger-pointing disciplinary way, but as a Loving Father. Daughter, don’t let the cares of this world choke out what I’ve already taught you.

Next I read in verses 3-4:

Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them 

around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. 

Then you will win favor and a good name in the 

sight of God and man.

Translated for me, this means to operate any ministry, as well as my personal life, with love and faithfulness as the mantra. Love and faithfulness wins favor and a good name.

Verses 5 and 6 is a biggie, and we all know it.  

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean 

not on your own understanding; in all your ways 

acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

There’s no need to wrestle with Him over this. Trust Him, not in my finite understanding. He will provide direction as I continually seek and acknowledge Him.

Following in the next two verses…

Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. 

This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.

I’d come to Him weary, achy, tired and struggling with joint pain. My wisdom will lead me to exhaustion. His wisdom brings health and nourishment.

I next read in verses 9 and 10:

Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the first-fruits 

of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to 

overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine. 

With regards to the ministry to single moms, He just then instructed me financially, to give outside of our ministry to others also working hard for His kingdom. Another biggie for me.

Are you feeling distant from God today? Sometimes it’s because of His discipline, which is His way of bringing us closer to Him.

As stated in verses 11-12:

My son, (or daughter) do not despise the Lord’s discipline 

and do not resent His rebuke, because the Lord disciplines 

those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.

Finding wisdom and gaining knowledge, is always His desire for us.

Blessed is the man who finds wisdom, the man who 

gains understanding, for she is more profitable than 

silver and yields better returns than gold. She is more 

precious than rubies, nothing you desire can compare 

with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand 

are riches and honor. Her ways are pleasant ways, and 

all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who 

embrace her; those who lay hold of her 

will be blessed. Verses 13-18

The rest of Proverbs 3 exhorted me to preserve sound judgement and discernment, to never lose sight of those two things. His promises of safety, sure-footedness, sweet sleep and confidence encouraged me as I read more about the benefits of wisdom.

There was nothing else for me to say to Him. He had spoken.

Whatever burdens we think we’re supposed to carry or when we need direction, the Lord has given us what we need right here in Proverbs 3.

I invite you to share below what you do when you need God's direction and are feeling frustrated. 

Staying the course through His word,

Terri

Here Comes Christmas

We bake, cook, decorate, plan, buy presents and get excited…or not. 

Maybe you’re worried about how you’re going to afford gifts for others. Maybe you feel pressure to meet others’ expectations. So you go through the motions, counting the days until January 1^st, missing the whole point of it all. 

Last week, as we prepared for Thanksgiving, I promised to make my own gratitude list after I encouraged you to. After all, how can I suggest you do something if I don’t do it too? Right? So I'm sharing a portion of it at the end of this post.

If you missed last week, simply scroll down below today's post to catch up.

So how’s your list coming? What kind of things were you surprised by as you began jotting down what you’re thankful for?

Or did you tell yourself it was a nice idea, but it wouldn’t change anything?

While that might be true, that your circumstances won’t change right away, what will happen is, you begin to change. The peaceful contentment you long for rises up in the midst of being grateful.

This time of year will always bring mixed emotions for me. And I know I’m not alone.

I’ve found that when I focus on the real reason I’m baking,  planning get-togethers, buying gifts or making them, I’m less vulnerable to disappointment or sadness. 

What is the real reason? The real reason is all because of Jesus Christ. He's all the reason. It's to Him I give thanks and to Him I celebrate His birth at Christmas. 

Apart from that, all the activities I'm doing become pointless and empty.

Not to negate cherishing the time with family and friends, wishing peace on earth, and good will toward all men. But if these are all we're hoping for, we're headed for disappointment and depression at the end of the year, rather than peaceful contentment that only Jesus brings.

Throughout the holidays and beyond, I try to focus on all God has given me; done for me and continues doing in my life. Not what I think He should do or give me or work out on my behalf on my time table. 

Comparing my life with others isn't allowed either. I wasted a lot of years doing that and believe me when I tell you, it DOES NOT help.

I’ve come to love Christmas again because, while I bake, decorate and buy a few gifts for loved ones, it’s Jesus I’m celebrating! 

The lights, music, time with family and friends are all part of it. Joy and peace are mine as I make it all about Him. 

Despite extreme commercialism and the skirmishes over saying Merry Christmas versus Happy Holidays, it's a joyous occasion. Like it or not, it's Jesus Christ we celebrate; nothing else. 

Will you, with me, not get sucked up in the societal hype of this season? Will you give yourself permission to enjoy celebrating Him with each dish you pull out of the oven, present you wrap or get-together you plan?

Will you join me in thankfully preparing for Christmas and allow yourself to enjoy every single part of it? 

Now, for my gratitude list. I tried to focus on less material things and zoom in on God’s everyday blessings that I take for granted. I’m not listing loved ones here, but they are on my extensive written list. 

So here goes:

• Pansies (it amazes me how they endure harsh weather)
• Front porch
• The two colorful maple trees in the front yard
• A crisp blue sky against fall trees
• My Bible
• The owl that lives nearby. He calls out at night and dawn. It’s soothing.
• Geese in a stagnant pond below our house. They leave every morning, but always come back at sunset.
• God’s unceasing pursuit of me, despite me.
• Forgiveness
• Hot coffee
• Prayer
• God’s unchanging love
• The upstairs room
• 93.3 Joy FM
• Celebrate Recovery
• Hope. There’s always hope where God is concerned
• Written words

I shared mine, so now I invite you to share in the comments below, some of the simple things that you’re grateful for.

Feel free to also share how you handle the Christmas season without getting sucked in to the commercialism. I could always use some fresh suggestions.

Staying the course during the holidays and beyond,

Terri

When Being Thankful is Difficult

Being thankful during this time of year can be difficult for some. Especially if you’re newly single, divorced or simply longing for a special person to share the holidays with.

Hardships are magnified. When it’s all you can do to keep the bills paid, buying a Thanksgiving turkey with all the trimmings can be burdensome, knowing that budgeting for Christmas is just around the corner.

Family conflicts can also suck the joy out of holiday gatherings.

As Thanksgiving approaches this coming week, for some of you it might be a reminder of some things lost, rather than things to be thankful for.

This season marks a lot of losses for me. Dating back to November of 1988, my divorce was final, just days before Thanksgiving.

Several years later before the holidays, my house was foreclosed on and we had to move.

As a single mom, money was already tight, but the holidays added extra financial pressure.

I remember another time when my kids and I had to move right before Christmas because the house we rented was sold right after Thanksgiving.

Two years ago, my mother-in-law passed away two weeks before Thanksgiving. That same year I had my last Thanksgiving meal with my Mom, as she passed away 12 days before Christmas.

What does this time of year mean for you? Do you have mixed emotions of nostalgia and sadness or does it mean all things cozy and wonderful?

Are you full of thanksgiving and gratitude or are you having a difficult time finding something to be thankful for?

As I mentioned above, some of the hardest times of my life were during the holidays, beginning with Thanksgiving. 

But as sure as I sit here today, I remember those were the times when God leaned in close and intimate, meeting me in the midst of my mess, filling me with gratitude that could only come from Him.

The Lord would always allow me to see someone else whose difficulties were worse than mine. I never had to look far to see someone whose struggles and hardships were far worse.

I read somewhere that making a gratitude list could have a thankful-snowball effect.

So I tried it.

I started with one simple thing. It snowballed from there. A sunny day. A roof over our heads. My kids. My job. Good friends and church family. Coffee. (Yes, coffee too)

You might feel like the things you should be thankful for, you're not. Don't pretend. Move on to that one simple thing for which you are grateful. 

Once I began my list I discovered I could keep going till the cows came home. (a southern expression)

This list was a mighty focus changer. All these little things I was thankful for I realized were provided by God. My greatest and most humble of all things I was thankful for was my salvation in Jesus Christ and personal relationship with Him.

Out of that would flow peace and comfort during the most difficult times. I’d end up awestruck at the goodness of God in my life no matter what my temporary circumstances were.

So what about you? Whether things are on the upside or you’re in a dark time, today is a great time to begin your list. Start with the simplest of things and go from there.

I'm going to start a new list. I really am. 

So grab a pen and a notebook and let’s get started.

May you discover the joy of a thankful heart. I pray God’s comfort and compassion overwhelm you as He turns your desert into a garden. And I pray joy and gladness are yours this coming Thanksgiving and beyond.

The Lord will surely comfort Zion and will look 

with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts 

like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the Lord. 

Joy and gladness will be found in her, 

thanksgiving and the sound of singing.

Isaiah 51:3

Staying the course with a thankful heart,

Terri

The Aftermath

It’s difficult to write a relative blog post in the aftermath of this past week. We’ve witnessed and experienced a historical event of epic proportions.

I confess, I’ve been distracted and enthralled by the events following the election of our next President of the United States.

I am humbly grateful to have the honor and privilege to be able to vote in this country and exercise my freedoms.

As the past week has unfolded, my focus is blurred. My attention is challenged by my attempts to ignore social media and restrain from commenting.

Some Americans’ hopes are dashed. Some are celebrating. Some are appalled and saddened while some feel a sense of relief and hope.

We’ve seen images of distraught young women, college students and adults running violently rampant throughout our cities.

This causes me to be deeply alarmed.

Those who place their hope in one person to solve the problems of our country, are setting themselves up for profound disillusionment and disappointment.

It’s like building your life’s foundation on top of quick sand. You never know when you’re going to sink down into the earth with no hope in sight.

The old hymn written by Edward Mote, The Solid Rock, comes to mind. We sang it in church this morning and I’ve been hearing it in my head all day.

The first verse of the song goes like this: 

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood 

and righteousness. I dare not trust the sweetest frame, 

but wholly lean on Jesus’ name.

The chorus continues:

On Christ, the solid Rock I stand; all other ground is 

sinking sand…all other ground is sinking sand.

This is where true peace and assurance that God is in control is found.

While standing firmly secure on this foundation, we are then able to pray for those who lead us, and trust Almighty God with the outcomes.

Will you stand with me on this foundation? As women in need, this is what we truly need. To be firmly and securely held by our Heavenly Father who has everything all worked out.

Will you trust the Lord Jesus Christ with me as we forge ahead with fresh determination to be all about God’s business while He tends to ours?

Will you pray with me for our newly elected President who has an exponential task set before him?

Will you work with me to spread the good news of Jesus Christ to all who will hear and become one of His own?

Now is the time to stay the course more than ever!

Terri

Doing, Building, Working: Is it all in vain?

Welcome friends, to this Monday's Marker. I'm late with my post this week and I apologize. I promise it's for good reason.

I'm a Nana again!! I now have three beautiful granddaughters. The newest one (Aubrey Elise) made her entrance last Wednesday afternoon. I was on toddler duty with her big sister, Sadie, who's two and half.

When I'm with Sadie, nothing else happens or gets done. I threw multi-tasking out the window a few years ago. All my writing, working or making phone calls goes to the to-do stack when I'm in Nana world, which I love.

While waiting for sweet Aubrey to arrive, my world outside of Nanahood kept spinning. Events beyond my control surfaced, such as:

• The single parent ministry I founded lost its director. 
• Important schedule conflicts surfaced on my calendar. 
• An upcoming event at my house my husband and I host each year was happening in several days.
• My "real" job still awaits, along with priority writing projects.
• The head cold I'd been fighting all last week finally won.

I ended my week hitting a wall of fatigue. When I got home from my daughter's on Friday, I crashed, knowing Saturday was coming along with about 30 people for our event. Which is tons of fun and all good, but nevertheless required me to keep going.

When my head hit the pillow last night (Sunday) I had nothing prepared for today. I always have a blog scheduled for you to go live every Monday morning.

This morning when I got up, still nothing. I sat in a stupor before the Lord during my quiet time, somewhat overwhelmed with stinking thinking, a bad attitude and questioning why I do all that I do.

I struggle with over committment and have to be careful. But sometimes when I honestly inventory all I'm doing, I feel there's nothing I can let go.

When I begin feeling frustrated with God, asking, why He called me to do this thing or that thing, I know the issue is with me. There's something I can and must let go.

I rely on God's word and His spirit in me for guidance every morning. It's not because I'm such a devoted, godly woman, but because I need Him. I need His fellowship. I need Him to fill me up each day. This is the only way I roll.

I turned to my scheduled reading plan for the day and in Psalm 127:1-2, this is what I read:

Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor 
in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, 
the watchmen stand guard in vain. 

In vain you rise early and stay up late, 

toiling for food to eat for he grants sleep to those he loves.

I just love it when God does this!

So I asked Him, "Am I laboring in vain?"

I felt His gentle nudge and reminder about the wise woman.

The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands 

the foolish one tears hers down. Proverbs 14:1

"Lord, am I being a foolish woman?"

He reminded me that doing, building and working in vain is when you're doing it to people please, for appearances sake; or out of fear of man's rejection. It was as if He said, "just be careful." 

God cautioned me that I was headed in that direction...again. I immediately removed one small event off my plate that I knew wasn't necessary, even though it was good.

God's reminder also kept me from assuming a certain role with the single-parent ministry despite losing our director. 

The reality is there will always be a schedule conflict, requiring me to prioritize prayerfully. 

Do you struggle with over-committment? Do you feel that all you're doing is in vain and fruitless?  

When I'm seeking only to please my Heavenly Father, the frustration fades. I am fulfilled and fellowship with Him is sweet. When I seek to please only Him, He shoulders the responsibility of the outcome; not me.

If you're like I am and need to be careful to not overload yourself, be encouraged that God does not call us to "all these things." He calls us to Himself...first. 

Then all we do will be an overflow of His work in our life. 

Will you stay the course with me by pleasing Him only? 

Feel free to share in the comments below your experiences with over committment. 

Terri

Keeping Up Appearances

I learned at an early age how to bury emotions and pretend things didn’t bother or hurt me. What I portrayed to my peers, was only what I wanted them to see. These pretensions followed me throughout my teen years into adulthood.

Whatever our current situation is, usually determines how pressured we feel to put up a front to hide our struggles and problems. 

The pressure to keep up with our neighbors or appear a certain way to our peers, doesn’t go away at age 21 or when we finish school, start our careers, marry and have children.

I think women struggle with this more than men. We compare ourselves ruthlessly to others and the head talk begins. 

She has the perfect body, prettier face, perfect parents, 

perfect house. Her husband is perfect, perfect kids, perfect

family, perfect job. Plenty of money. Nice furniture. 

And did you see those shiny appliances?

We then begin our lifelong quest to be like those who we think are perfect, not realizing they have their own struggles and problems. 

When I was a young Christian, I looked up to godly women who’d walked this road ahead of me and were mature in their relationship with Christ.

They had it together. Home, marriage, kids, and outward appearance was neatly packaged into what I thought being a godly woman looked like.

They could quote scripture and knew all the important biblical stories. They attended every church function, volunteered and made homemade granola and play dough with their kids.

Don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with all those things. But there was never any talk about struggles with sin or getting too deep with personal problems. So I thought being a Christian meant you no longer had serious problems.

Living in the southeast, I think, also adds to the expectations of what a godly Christian woman's life looks like.

Keeping up appearances is exhausting. It’s something you’d only expect with non-Christians or those who don’t have a personal relationship with Christ.

We’re surrounded by people every day working hard to keep up appearances, while struggling with the real stuff of life; past hurts, mistakes, dark secrets all buried deep down. 

In my late twenties, I went through a devastating divorce and became a single parent. Foreclosure, bankruptcy and a car repossession was hard to hide.

So much for keeping up appearances, right? Those were just the material things. There was still the emotional pain and shame to deal with.

This marked the point in my life where things got real with Jesus. My messy problems got bigger, and my struggles were many. I learned that my God was bigger still. 

Life can change in a day. Keeping up appearances is a waste of our energy. Jesus already sees to our core, and there's no need to pretend with Him. 

Surround yourself with others who are honest about their struggles and problems and who you can also be real with. Then pray for each other so you can be healed.

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray 

for each other so that you may be healed. James 5:16

This will end your exhausting quest to keep up appearances for others. 

Where can you find these people? If you don't have a strong church family or small group, a great place to find these people is at a nearby Celebrate Recovery program; a Christ-centered recovery program for anyone struggling with ANY hurts, hangups or habits. That's pretty much everyone, right? To find a CR group near you, go to Celebrate Recovery. 

This won't all happen in one day, but I bet if you ask God, He will lead you to others who, like you, want to move past the pretenses and enjoy freedom and true joy in Him.

And of course, as always, feel free to contact me ANYTIME. You can send a private email by using the contact form on the right of this page or leave a comment below where you feel comfortable for others to see.

Let's stay the course, and be real together.

Terri

When You Turn Out the Lights

During my early months as a single mom, I dreaded turning the lights out at night. 

I was a knee-knocking, fearful 27-year old in charge of the safety of my two children in the other bedroom.

I haven’t told many people this, but those first months I was alone, I slept with a knife hidden under my mattress. A big one.

I remember putting a chair at each door, tilted just under the doorknob to keep out danger.

We had a big dog too. Sheba slept outside in her cozy doghouse in our fenced-in yard, so I thought.

One night she erupted into an attack bark right under my bedroom window, followed by her galloping to the back corner of the yard. My feet hit the floor like bowling balls and kneeled to look out into the dark.

Minutes later, Sheba returned to her spot underneath my window and I went back to bed.

I told myself it was probably just a deer or other night animal.

What I didn’t know was she’d been sleeping under my window every night instead of in her doghouse. When I would turn out the lights, I could see her laying right there beneath my window.

I began to notice when I was in another part of the house, I could look out and there she’d be.

God used Sheba to remind me that He set His angles in place to guard over me.

For He will command His angels concerning you, to guard you in all your ways. Psalm 91:11 

Eventually I put the knife back in the kitchen where it belonged and didn’t have Sheba anymore.

Over time, I realized my Protector was mightier than any physical weapon I had or Sheba. I wasn’t so afraid for our safety anymore.

The Lord used those single-mom years to teach me more than I would’ve learned had I not gone through those tough times.

Are you alone for the first time in many years, and dread turning out the lights at night? Are you going through some tough times right now and feel alone?

The Lord Jesus will use this time to make His presence known to you, as you set your thoughts on Him. He’s already thinking about you.

Indeed, the very hairs on your head are all numbered. 

Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than 

many sparrows. Luke 12:7

And when you fall asleep, you can have peace.

In peace I will lie down and sleep, for You alone, 

Lord, make me dwell in safety. Psalm 4:8

Whatever tough times you’re experiencing, I can tell you this: Our Heavenly Father specializes in showing His faithfulness during tough times. 

He will use our struggles no matter how big or small to equip us for brighter days and use for His purposes.

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned, the flames will not set you ablaze. Isaiah 43:2

Today, trust Him as your Protector and faithful Deliverer. On the other side of your troubles, you will have no doubt that He is the One True God, 

Let's stay the course, by trusting Him in the tough times.

Terri